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Paula’s Blog

Hello Damion,  I don’t ever find a need to see Dave.  He has given me no reason to hate him, or no reason to want to stay chummy either.  He’s out there living his life, and as long as he does that, I do not have to deal with him and my life will run as normal as it can be.  Thanks for reading my story.

103 Responses to “Paula’s Blog”

  • Hi Patrick, sorry about you losing your note…shucks! I would really have liked reading it. You are right, no child should ever see or feel hurt and pain, but if you got anything out of this story, see hope and strength and if you run into another child you believe is suffering….point them in the right direction! Be a cool friend. We have a cool society of students today with some of the most awesome teachers that really really care about what happens to all of you.
    Thanks again, and if you ever want to write that letter again, I’d love to read it. Best, Paula

  • Hello Jessica, sorry you couldn’t be there that day. Your first question, I never really left Mount Vernon since being entered into the foster care system, I’m the only sister that never left Mt. Vernon. Was it hard to come back to the High School? Oh yes! Had a lot of bullying going on there, and when I came the first time, I almost got back in my car. No one was with me, and it was a bit scary, but I kept thinking I have to do this, and I was glad I did, and I hope to come back many times to talk to more of you. Second question, yes Dave and Lynn are still married…they are like to peas in a pod. I have seen all of my sisters, never all at one time, but I am content knowing they all have their own lives and that took a long time to get to that conclusion, but it’s okay now. Jessica, I am so glad your mind on foster care was changed, and I’m hoping for the best. Also, I hope you saw strength and encouragement that we can all get through anything….my favorite quote reads like this: Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning how to dance in the rain…and dear I’ve danced in a lot of rain! And your last question, I would answer as many questions as you have for me. I look forward to hearing from you again. Anytime! Best, Paula

  • Dear Maxim, from one military brat to another….it’s tough, but guess what? All that strict stuff…it’s helped me keep jobs, keep my surroundings in good condition, helped me to raise my kids to know and feel that same strength you have as a military child. If there is anything I really look back and thank God for is that strict up bringing…I have said all along, it might have been just that one thing that helped me through all of the changes in foster homes, all those changes in base living. All of my foster parents appreciated that I knew how to take care of my self, as well as my belongings. It’s tough, but guess what? I would do that part all over again, I really would. My son went into the Army and I think it was the best thing that happend to him. It made him so strong, and such a good worker at his job, and a great father to his three little ones…do not give up. That military conditioning will pay off, I promise. Thanks for the encouragement! Best, Paula

  • Hi Johnathan, Thanks for the encouragement. No one will ever understand why all the “stuff” happend, My reason for sharing this story is to give those that do not think tomorrow is coming….hope! Today, unlike the 70’s, there is a bunch more avenues to go for help. No, we five sisters have never been in the same room again since our seperation for over 39 years now. I’ve met with them each indivdually, we three older sisters get together a few times here and there, maybe about 10 times at one time since then, (see pics on web site) Just hold your family and siblings if you have any, hold on tight, family is all you got! Thanks for your encouragement. Best, Paula

  • Hello Juana, thanks for the encouraging words. I really hope and pray no other kids go through anything like this, but they do…each and every day…right in front of our eyes. My message to you is to see hope and strengh and to know the foster care system isn’t for bad kids, it’s for kids who’s parents do not know how to be parents, and perhaps need a little help to learn, sometimes, they just don’t need the kids at all. Foster care is a great thing when parents can’t just do it, and they save kids every day. Thanks for your encouragement! Best, Paula

  • Miss Abbey, that was such a nice thing to read from you. I believe it will be a movie soon. The screen writer is talking to a couple of production companies now…the movie will start with us three sisters getting off the bus to walk up to meet our case workers that took us to foster care. I believe it wont’ be long, but thanks so much. Pass this story to someone that you believe just needs that little push towards hope and strength. It was my honor to come back to the school I graduated, my kids graduated, and now my three little grand children are coming up in. Thanks a bunch. Paula

  • Quinton, it was a pleasure to come to speak to your class. Your words will help keep me strong and marching like a soldier myself to help all students see what you saw in this story. It was a pleasure, really it was. The “Bright Side” is always the message I hope you all see. Best, Paula

  • Nikki, thank you so much for your kind words, and hang on tight to your mama! I’m just touched that you share how much she means, many do not know how much their parents do care and mean to them. That is an important thing to learn in your life. I’ll keep my head up, but you keep yours up too…your words mean a bunch to read! Write me anytime! Best, Paula

  • Dear Jared, How did I deal with my life as a kid, how do I do it now? How did I put one foot in front of the other every day and see light? I hope that you are not living what I did, but if you are, here is a quote I love….”Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning how to dance in the rain” I found cool stories of hope and encouragement and continually told myself…if they can do it, so can I! That is why I wrote this story. Young man, you write me any time you need a friend. I’ll be here. Dance in the rain (today…the snow) but see strength and encouragement in this story….not sorrow. You feel free to write me anytime! See a bright light, life is and can be very good! Even after hardships, and that is my message to all of you…the “Bright Side”….k? Sincerely, Paula

  • Dear Sierra, Yes, I got to see the twins again when they were about 32. They were 6 when I saw them in that drive way that final day. I have contacted and visited with all of my sisters. We have never been in the same room at the same time since then, but we all have our individual lives and I know they are in a safe place. It is so great to know so many ask about them. If I had a way to go back and change one thing about what happend, it would be that I stuffed them into that little grocery bag we three took as our ventures into the new world of foster care so that it saved them from the horrors they endured after we left. They are in places I feel are as safe as they can be right now. I walked through that story with hope and prayers from a bunch of birth family who never knew where we were…foster care does save children. All of those families were not bad, they were actually very much nicer than where we were…sometimes to get through…I would imagine we were just at a strange party…it would soon be over…kids imagine things to help, but those people, the case workers and the parents really did help…if it would have been different….I wouldn’t be traveling to tell this story to give more of you hope that you too…can get through anything. When you are having a bad day, just remember this favorite quote of mine: “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass….it’s about learning how to dance in the rain.” Find positive reinforcements to help you through a bad day…do not walk towards the dark negative patterns that will encourage tears….thanks for your encouraging words! Best, Paula

  • Hi Katie, it was a pleasure to come to your school in Danville Ohio to share my story. I would have written you sooner but I became very involved with getting the new version of the memoir or story out as the new and revised edition, which launches on Monday of next week. Forgive me for not getting back sooner. I love this Big Buddies Program you speak of. How wonderful, you are a strong person for wanting to help other children, good job! You do not know it yet, but just trying to help, really helps these kids, they will never forget you, and you do make a huge difference! Go back to my web site to see all the new stuff that happend since I spoke to your class. The movie writing is moving right along also! Keep up the good job with they kids, and write me anytime! Sincerely, Paula

  • Hello Ashley, sorry I didn’t write you right back. A bunch of new exciting things happening. The new revised edition of the memoir will be launched on Monday of next week. See the web site….www.edgeofunthinkable.com to see the new stuff. Thanks for your words of encouragement. It always helps me keep on sharing. I hope that you really heard hope and strength…thanks again! Paula

  • Josie, thank you for your kind words! I would have gotten back to you sooner, but I have been working with the publisher to get the new polished revision of the story out. It will be launched to the world on Monday of next week. I am pleased that you saw inspiration, not sorrow cause that is what all of this story is about. Thanks again for your inspiration. sincerely, Paula (the web site is full of new up coming events…www.edgeofunthinkable.com

  • Hello Allison, sorry I didn’t blogg you back sooner, been so crazy busy getting out the new version…which launches on Monday next week. I am feeling my lap top is a new sibling! Been a terrific journey traveling and talking to all of you, at the different schools…been a rewarding journey to give back to my society that helped my sisters and I grow up and be productive! You can write me any time. You might want to go to the web site to see all the new events happening with “Edge Of Unthinkable” company. Just know it’s always my pleasure to meet all of you….the new book is out on amazon now. I hope you have the rest of a good year at school and keep your head up! Sincerely, Paula

  • Hi Molly, I am just now getting around to answering (mostly learning how to answer) all of my bloggs…wow! I’m really gaining more strength seeing how many of you are seeing the “bright side” of hope and strength…I’ll keep my head up, these kind words help me so much. You might want to go to the web site to see all of the new events happening since I spoke to your class! http://www.edgeofunthinkable.com Sincerely, Paula

  • Hey Randy, thanks! But on Monday, the new revised, polished memoir will be launched to the world…through a huge leading industry publisher. I have had my face dug into my lap top doing so much preparing for it…it feels like a new sibling to me now! Thanks for the encouragement! Paula

  • Hi Starr..hope all is well…call me some time girly! Would like to chat with you. Paula

  • Hi Kris, life is really good. The new revised, polished, memoir launches to the world on Monday! I’m so excited. The new press release is loaded on the web site. Thanks for the kind words, and like I said, all is very good! thanks! Paula

  • Marsha, no excuse..but I just learned to blogg back. (Yikes) Just wanted to say thank you for your kind words from that class in Delaware…but as of this coming Monday, the new revised, polished, memoir will launch to the world through a new publisher…IUniverse. See the web site for all the new stuff happening. And just so you know…speaking to the foster moms and dads out there is truly My honor. I hope to see you again at a speaking event, a training, or even as a guest at my cabin to retreat…see the web site. Best, Paula

  • Hello Jeanne, it’s been awhile since you contaced me. I just wanted to thank you for the kind words. It’s almost been a couple years now since I started venturing out to speak and train. As of Monday, the new polished, revised, version of the memoir will launch to the world. It is being taught in high schools and even universities as a subject! I am honored. I wanted it to be absolutely perfect so I hired a line editor to polish…took out a couple of chapters, and added a final chapter, I’m so happy I spent the time. Thank you again for your kind words. All of the updates are on the web site. Thanks!
    Paula

  • Hello Jeanne, it’s been awhile since you contaced me. I just wanted to thank you for the kind words. It’s almost been a couple years now since I started venturing out to speak and train. As of Monday, the new polished, revised, version of the memoir will launch to the world. It is being taught in high schools and even universities as a subject! I am honored. I wanted it to be absolutely perfect so I hired a line editor to polish…took out a couple of chapters, and added a final chapter, I’m so happy I spent the time. Thank you again for your kind words. All of the updates are on the web site. Thanks!
    Paula

  • Paige Black:

    Paula, Throughout your book I couldn’t help but be reminded of what my life was like in contrast to yours, as you discribed different places in time so well. It was like watching an old 8mm movie of my childhood and growing up and being able to pinpoint the exact moments in time that you describe in your book, and being able to compare our experiences side by side. While those years for me were filled with a close-knit family and a household full of love, support and happy times, I now know that just across town, maybe 2-3 miles from my home, there was a girl not much older than I, going through HELL. I never had any idea what you and Sharon were going through. I had no idea that your lives had been much different than mine until you talked to me about your book a few years ago. There is so much that I would like to say, so many things that your book has brought to my mind today, but I’m just not up to typing all of it today and I don’t want to “hog up” all the space on your blog. I just want you to know that I am so happy that you survived. I am happy that you managed to escape from the hell your life was and to have found a way to come out at the other end a sane, intelligent, caring and amazing person. I doubt many others would have fared nearly as well under the same circumstances. I know I would not have. I’d have folded like a cheap suit. You are truly an inspiration. I’ve only read the PDF file of your book on my computer, but I would like to someday have a hard copy that I can proudly add to the collection on my bookshelf. I would be honored if that copy were to bear your signature inside the cover. You’ve come a LOOOOOOOOOOOOONG way, baby! Paige

  • Johnny Two-Shoes:

    Dear Paula,
    Thank-you so much for coming to our class! I really enjoyed learning about your life and everything in it! I hope you have fun with your camp! Johnny Two-Shoes March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

    P.S. Can’t wait to see your movie!

  • Emmit:

    Dear,Paula I am amazed that you could make it through something like that because I don’t think that I could make it through a situation like that, and I have a question for you, what would you tell kids to do if they were in a situation like you were? And did you ever call and tell your step father or mother that you forgive them? P.S. I can’t wait to read your book! March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Zach:

    Hi, My dad was kind of like that, but not as bad. My dad went to school one day and came back and his mom was gone and he never saw her for a couple years and when he saw her, he would be mad at her because he thought that it was her fault about the divorce. I was also thinking about the janitor, angle dude and I also believe that he was an angel, or the school just forgot about him and forgot to put him in the records. March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Oscar:

    Paula, I find your life interesting but the thing I found inside the story that i found even more interest was that your step-mom was mean. If you think about other stories it is the step-mom that is normally mean,but a question that I have is did one of the bases you were at as a kid ever get attacked? March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Sam Yoder:

    Paula,
    My parents are divorced, and they are both dating someone else. I really hate it. Thanks for coming, it made me realize that other people have, or had, situations that are worse than mine. How did you feel when your step-dad said that you were no longer going to live with him? Did he show any sadness when he told you this? Did you know that he wasn’t your real dad before he told you? Do you ever miss your real dad? I think that it is sad that you still do not know why your mom died, especially because you were blamed that you and your sisters killed her. Once again, thanks for coming and visiting us. March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Erica:

    Paula,
    Thank you for coming in to Bethany and talking to to us. We appreciate it! I am always telling parents how bad my life is or how mean they are to me. When you came in and told us your story it made me realize that some people have had or have it a lot worse than me. It made me appreciate my parents more than I did before. I used to think that they were mean and now I realize there not mean. You are an awesome person who is smart, beautiful, caring, and wonderful! Erica March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Elise:

    Paula,
    Thanks for coming to our school and talking to us! It was great hearing your story but it was very sad. Now I realize how grateful and thankful i am for my parents and siblings. I also have finished reading your book. That must have been very hard to write. You are a wonderful and amazing person! From Elise March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Julianne:

    Paula,
    Thank you so much for coming to our school. From listening to your story I found myself thinking about how glad I am to have a stable home and stable parents. When you told us the story about the janitor that told you and your sisters to talk I was thinking how neat that was. The story made me curious who the janitor really was. I think it could of been an angel. I also thought maybe the school found out what he did and the police were informed. That could of been why the school never told you about him later. I plan to read your book very soon! I am also excited to see the movie when it comes out!
    I hope that God is always a big support for you! March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Rachel:

    Last night I was telling my little sister how good of a life we have even though we have a 3 person home with 6 people living there and family and friends coming over a lot. We don’t have the best life ever, but we could have been born into a family with a lot more problems then we have. My mom says we live in a bubble of safety. My parents don’t drink or smoke, and neither of them have been divorced. Thanks for coming to our class and sharing. It was quite interesting. Tell me how did you get through it all? Rachel March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • billy joe:

    Dear Paula,I was wondering do you ever remember about the abuse, and if you do when and were. I also tried to compare your life with mine and I could not do that. The day after you came I was thinking what it would be like to be abused.
    Oh and one question did you ever find your mothers grave. March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • ava:

    dear Paula Kyle,
    How many siblings do you have?I have some siblings not as many as you have but I have four siblings two brothers and two sisters.Three are half brother and sisters the two girls and the one boy.I am very thankful for you coming in and teaching us how lucky some of us our to not be treated like that.What are you doing for spring break?I as well wanted to know when the camp to come visit the horses.How are your siblings? Are they doing well? Do you have grandchildren and how many? do just like working with horses or all animals?I enjoy working with all animals including farm and wild like I one time have held a monkey and a tuecan and even pariot’s.It is so cool you have horses they are so soft and pretty it would be fun to have horses like yours.Every time I think about you I think about all the ruff times you have been through and how you have ecomplished a lot for you and the kids that come to your camp. Thanks agian for coming in our class it was so interesting to here your story and it made me think a lot about how lucky I am. March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • Caleb:

    Dear Paula,
    Thank you for coming to my classroom and telling us your story. It was very interesting. That janitor that you thought was and angel reminded me of somebody I know. She goes to my church. She was going to Chicago by train for the first time. she was afraid that she would get off at the wrong stop. When she got on the train a lady sat down beside her. Now, the lady that sat down beside her was a bigger lady so she was kind of annoyed. It turned out she was really nice. They talked all the way there. When it was her stop the lady got off with her. The lady pointed her in the direction of where she needed to go. When she turned around to say thank you the lady just disappeared, that’s when it hit her. It must have been an angel. I think it was. What do you think. Sincerely, Caleb March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th graders

  • bob:

    Dear Paula,
    First I would like to thank you for for coming to the school.It was GOOD!Do you still worry about your step dad and when you did not live with your sisters did sent them card and for there birthdays did you see them did your foster parent let you go see them.and the only thing I remember is when you had tears in your eye and felt very sad and in my head I was saying why did this happen to you and i felt so bad and thank you for coming to the school once again.I hope you can come again.And I want to read the book so good and I loved the powerpoint! Bob 6th Graders March 15, 2012

  • Carmen:

    Dear Paula,
    Thank you for coming to Bethany and telling your story. I could not even think of my parents being like your dad was. Would you please explain you brothers and sisters to me I really didn’t get that part of your life. I have had a lot of fights with my parents and siblings but not as big of ones that you told us. The day you came in I had orchestra and i didn’t get to buy your book, Do you know where I could get one? I live on a farm in the country and we don’t have any animals right now but we are going to have chickens, pigs, lambs, goats, and when I am 13 I am going to get a horse. I love animals and nature. Nature is very important in my life. I feel close to god when I am in the wood in my back yard. When I grow up I want to not just rescue animals but people too. I find my self sitting on a rock and praying for those people that live on the road and have no one to love them like you do today. Someday I want a Angle come to me and help me just like it did to you. How are you children and grandchildren? I think the camp that you take pictures for would be so fun. My dad and his family is from Ohio, we might look you up in the summer and go over there! I hope your cousin is doing ok, my cousin and I are 8 days apart!!!!! Hope you have a wonderful day!!!! March 15, 2012 Goshen Indiana 6th

  • Mrs. Edlund:

    Dear Paula,
    Thank you so much for coming and speaking to our school. I know that you had a large impact on our residents. We talk about you and your story every day. We make sure to set aside special time in class to read a chapter of your book each day. We are only on Chapter 3, but so far we have really enjoyed reading your story.

    Thank you for taking so much time out to spend with our kids. So many times, they have difficulty visualizing themselves in the future. They struggle with where they want to be, what they want to live in, what job they would like to have, and who they want to be. Hearing your story and seeing how successful you are gave them so much hope.

    Again, Thank you so much!

    Mrs. Edlund
    Bashor Children’s Home
    Goshen, IN

  • Luna:

    Dear Paula,

    I was amazed by your story. I am so glad that you got saved by the foster care system so you could tell your story to us. More children should hear your story so they could be more thankful with what they have. Plus, I like the therapy horse idea:]!

    Your friend,
    Luna:]

  • charlie:

    Dear Paula, I liked your story because I know I don’t have to worry about any of the that happened to you. Also I feel so sorry for you because you got abused.

    Sincerely,

    Charlie

  • Tyler:

    Dear Paula,
    Thank you for coming to our class. I really appreciate it. When you talked about how you were orphaned it reminded me of my best friend. He shared some similarities with you but was not neglected like you. I really appreciate again that you could come in and talk about it.
    Sincerely,
    Tyler

  • Hannah:

    Dear Paula,
    I really liked your story it was inspiring. I’m happy that that didn’t happen to me, but sad because it actually happened to someone who didn’t deserve to be beaten when they didn’t do anything. hearing your story made me kind of sad especially when your dad told that lie. That was unnecessary.

    Your Friend,
    Hannah

  • Bob:

    Dear Paula,

    I was wondering why did you save those horses? Also why are they on the cover on your book? I am very glad that you told us your story, I’m thankful that didn’t happen to me
    Sincerely Bob Jordan

  • Peeta:

    Dear Paula, You have a very inspiring story. Now I see how much I take the good life for granted. When you said the Janitor said “I’ll guard the door” I made a connection with the bible, like when the angel was guarding the door to the garden of Eden. I think maybe the janitor might have been an angel.
    Your friend,
    Peeta

  • Sam:

    Dear Paula,
    I have always wondered about the janitor that got you and your sisters together. Did it really feel like he tapped you one the shoulder? I’m so glad my life wasn’t as difficult as yours. When people talk to you about your childhood, do you feel sad when you get a quick flashback? Thank you so much for coming to our school. You were a great speaker. Have a good day and God bless you.

    Yours truly,
    Sam

  • nichole:

    Dear Paula,
    I was wondering if you ever thought of going under cover and see who that janitor was? Also I wondered if you and your sisters and brother ever talk about when your dad was nice and played with you? Do you ever wonder if your mom had a will for you and your sisters before she died?
    From, Nichole

  • Sally:

    Dear Paula,
    I think your story is very inspiring to kids that don’t talk about their problems to other people at their home. I was glad not to have a bad life like yours, but now I know not to disobey my parents and I do feel bad for what you had to go through. Are your twin sisters ever going to get off the streets??? Do you have any marks when you got hit or got over abused???

    sincerely,
    Sally

  • Bella:

    Dear Paula, I feel that I have it so good compared to what you had to deal with.
    I wonder who the janitor was and I wonder who your real mother was like?

    Sincerely,
    Bella

  • Cynthia:

    Dear Paula,
    I just CAN’T believe what experiences you have been through! I am glad I didn’t have to go through that in my childhood. I was wondering about your foster homes. What were they like? How hard was it to make new friends?

    Your friend,
    Cynthia
    P.S thank you for sharing with us
    P.P.S I hope I can get your book

  • Stanly:

    Dear Paula,
    I thought about your presentation and I had some questions. So why did your father not want you anymore? I might not have heard it in the presentation. And will your sisters ever come back to America? I enjoyed the presentation and i am glad that I did not have to go through the struggles that you did that was full of neglect and hatred. I hope others can hear about your life and understand it.

    Your Friend,
    Stanley
    Ps. Your book sounds neat and i cant wait to read it

  • Bob of the Amazon:

    Dear Paula,
    Your story is amazing! The beginning reminds me of how my dad moved around a lot when he was a kid. Also, the book Runaway Twin by Peg Kehert reminds me of your story reminds me of you. Your story is a little sadder because in the book the character’s parents died at a young age.

    Thanks again,
    Bob of the Amazon

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